Can you feel the silent mutiny ?

Morgan Rowan wrote:

Quote :

The lights were shining bright when all of a sudden, the boat tipped overboard and all the heart lights were underwater - slowly some emerged, shining quietly, but bright. Slowly, more of then are resurfacing. Some, may be lost in the sea. Some may still resurface. But, overall, the heart lights ARE still shining. Hopefully, those who choose, will help those light still struggling to be slowly pulled back into the boat. But the heart lights are shining, just as Clay showed us this weekend, he still shines.

you made me cry.

That made me cry as well!

Basket you have such a good way of expressing yourself.

I am in full support of this board, and I would be so sad if we ever shut down.

I love you Morgan, and I love everyone else as well!

Been away with RL and have no clue what this is all about. All I know is I check in when I can and post if I have something to add. What everyone else does, feels, says, etc. is not my concern. I say live and let live!

fntzmk, I don't know either.....

I've been here a while, and I don't think there are cliques here (are there?). I am grateful for the handful of people that respond to my lame posts...thank the lord.....because if it weren't for a few nice souls who respond on occasion, I'd feel more like I did in high school, not as member of a clique but as a complete outsider.

I don't have relationships with anyone on PM or online. I don't even know what the CV is. I think I may speak for the members who only come to this board. The one other board that I belonged to, ProC, died two years ago. This is why I'm glad that there is an "upstairs." All that business is available if you want to participate, but one can safely swim down here in the warm clear waters of obliviousness if one is so inclined.

..and on this one? The water is fine down here......ahhhh....look at the clouds.....

i agree i don't see cliques at all and if they are i feel we are mature enough to handle them. This whole thread exploded and really i'm not sure i even understand it. I think people are posting as much as they can. I don't know why it has to be said that we aren't and that this board is dying. I think this board is fine. We have disagreements at times on many issues but we still remain friends. If there are cliques here then I'll just have to try and break through one of them

I'll be more than glad to add paranoid to the list of things I've been told I am lately . . .

honest

I'd rather be paranoid.

Send the guys in the white coats for me. Is ok.

amainachen wrote:

i agree i don't see cliques at all and if they are i feel we are mature enough to handle them. This whole thread exploded and really i'm not sure i even understand it. I think people are posting as much as they can. I don't know why it has to be said that we aren't and that this board is dying. I think this board is fine. We have disagreements at times on many issues but we still remain friends. If there are cliques here then I'll just have to try and break through one of them

I feel like threads like this are started just to stir things up. I feel all is going well, sometimes a little slow (but we all have lives outside the board), but none the less all is going well, and then out of the blue a thread like this is started just to seek attention and stir up drama. It's threads like these that make me want to leave as well. I only stay because of the few friends I have here who have asked me not to. But when threads like this are posted I feel like I'm in junior high all over again. Normally I try to avoid these posts, but seems like they are starting to be a regular thing now and then. I'm not trying to be disrespectful to anyone or take anyone's side, but it's starting to get old.

I am going to put in my 2 cents.
I don't send emails to anyone on this board. I have emailed Debbie (amain) because she has traveled with my friends and me to concerts and to a few get-togethers. And I also emailed Cincy when she invited me and my friends to her party in Cary.
I don't do this on a regular basis.
I am tired of reading all this negativity. It seems that whenever things seem to be going well, someone starts a thread like this and everyone gets upset. I do think there are some ego problems. That's all I will say about that.

Morgan, I am very upset about one of the statements that you made.
That maybe for the first time not all gay men are seen as child molesters, predators and sexual deviates.
There lies the problem for a lot of people. Unfortunately a lot of people think the same way and maybe that's why they are having problems

I have researched and read a lot about this subject, the information I found that very very few truly gay men are child molesters, predators or sexual deviates. although they are portrayed to be so. These people are usually hetrosexuals with a mental illness or something happened to them in their past such as being molested themselves.

Michael Jackson is the exception, he is just mentally ill in my opinion.

I am not going to post information on this subject, everyone can do the research themselves and it probably wouldn't change their minds anyway.

I am still Clay's number one fan. That's my opinion and I am sticking with it.

I just need time to think....these medicines are making my head all foggy so...................

just going to say I love you ALL

and well I need you...
thats all I know for certain without doubt

heder

Pumpkin

I think you totally misunderstood the statment about gay men. I was saying the same thing you are. That the stereotype is not true and suggesting that some that thought that were starting to understand it wasn't true.

Maybe if you read it again it would make more sense to you.

all this talk about Clique Chicks? we're not THAT now, are we?? a show of hands pleaze to keep our former title!!

Hi Babygirl!! guess what??

k ON MY WAY TO READ AND RESPOND

U GOT MAIL TOO.....

Morgan Rowan wrote:

Cincy

The board is made up of members. CAPCH is me

and it is you and it is each one of us.

Clay Aiken Please Click Here is an invitation to Clay to join us. This board is not Clay Aiken. . . he is not a member. This board is a family he created.

Morgan,

I'm with those that honestly thought all was going just fine.
I thought everyone was over the worst.These things take time.


Those that still have some things to work out are doing so.
I haven't read all the posts on this thread, it's a little late here and I need to get to bed. I will read them in the morning. But I just wanted to write this brief message for now..

I thought you were doing great with the board. You brought some new idea's to the Community. New forums where we could discuss other topics that are of interest to some.

I do have to disagree with something in the above Quote.

Quote: "This board is a family he created".

To me, this is a family YOU created because of him. Without YOU there would be no US as we know it.......You brought all of us together, you are the reason for this group of wonderful people finding each other........

I think you deserve -

Jane, you sure write right from the late at night!!

I, too, thought everything was going okay. All this surprised me, especially since I don't personally see a mutiny at all here.

And, by seeing "guest" for Joan's posts, I guess she left? That makes me very sad.

I want to thank those of you who had something to say and said it with respect and honesty the way it should be here.

Others were flat out rude.

This forum is provided by me and the decisions for its use are solely my own. Again, I am not a business nor do I represent one. I am not following anyone's rules but my own.

If you don't like that or if you find me someone you can't respect, I strongly, strongly suggest you find another home and remove your membership here. I really don't like removing people, I'd prefer they went on thier own.

Why would you want to associate yourself with a page on the internet run by me if you have no respect or patience for me. That simply makes no sense. It's not the OFC where you belong because of Clay and don't need to respect the decisions of the mods. I am not a mod. I am the administrator and just like Clay on the OFC, I get to set the rules.

If you have no respect for my decisions
If you truly can't stand listening to me talk anymore
If you can't speak of my decisions without feeling a need to denigrate me personally because of them.


I suggest its time for you to go.

Do I want anyone to go ? No. It will make me very sad. We are family and I love each of you and have proved it time and again by accepting members who have been far less than kind to me and allowing them to return and be with thier friends. If you think I'm talking about someone in particular, you are wrong. You might be surprised how many of them there are. I'm sure there are a few people out there right now saying to themselves. . . yes, I was not nice to her at all and broke rules and even dissed her and this board to others and she let me back in and has been nice to me since.

So bottom line is this is my hobby, my enjoyment and I love all of you but when the relationships turn dark and ugly and people feel its ok to attack my feelings in this original post as attention seeking, over the top, getting old, drama queen, or worse, I think you fail to remember that I'm a human being also.

How would you feel if it were your heartfelt post that people were saying such things about.

I said nothing in the original post to bash anyone. I called no one by name. I simply spilled out my sadness and my feelings. Maybe I need to get a life and not invest so heavily here but if I do, this board will end. So, its your choice. Deal with my occasional break downs with grace and love or ignore them if you wish. But if you came out guns drawn to tell me off. . . well, you think about what that means.

Yep thats another rant.

Do with it what you want.

morgan

~~~~~~~~~~~

Joe,

It makes me very sad also.



Just for information sake, Cincy deleted her membership before I posted that last post. It was her personal decision for whatever reasons she might have - she hasn't shared them with me.

She did not leave because of the post I just put up.

I remember a time when I wasnt so nice to you.....and other people, and I was welcomed back with open arms.... I appreciated you then and still do to this very day...Ive had my moments of everything from being a total bitch to someone, to wanting to never return here after people had verbally assaulted me in anonymous emails...and even a few public snarks on me...I got over it, mostly because I want to be a better person....


I will admit that you have time and time again defended me when people have judged me or claimed that I did or said something I didnt say....

I know that I am not the person who stands up and says I am a Morgan fan....I hope and pray that my posts reflect that I am your friend....better than being a fan...being a fan is so one sided...but a friendship is something two people can share....

I will admit that when it comes to You and Cincy I have tried to stay clear of it......I cant "fight" like most people...I just take things until I explode and then I get all confused and jumbled and make no sense....you two have had this going on for so many years....sometimes I did feel a "Love" between you two, and acceptance, but sometimes that burns out and it sucks to see two people I care for not getting along, but Im a big girl now I have to accept what others feel and do.

Morgan I have said it before and will say it now...I do not envy your position, I couldnt do what you do, I would be under my blankets, calling in to work sick and crying till my eyes fell out....

I know that some people will see this post as you being harsh...I know because it happens alot...but for the record I know you...I know that this is hurting you more than you even say it is...I know that you think the board is dying...well let me tell you something...THIS BOARD isnt going anywhere.....we ARE a family, hell families fight all the time...but the thing that remains is the center core of love and need and friendship...

I love you Morgan, I hope you never forget that, even when I cant find the right words to say, even when I dont jump in the middle of an argument, even when I just read and take things in until I am able to post without sounding irrational....

YOU are a very special lady, you have given many people a home that has changed their lives, myself included....you have done many wonderful things for Clay's foundation, you have been there for people, and helped out when you had the means to do so....You have been the one person in this world who has helped me see things about myself that I didnt wanna see, you have made me a better person by showing me all your colors and teaching me about getting hurt and standing right back up...if anyone I could name as a survivor of verbal abuse by others...it would be YOU Ive seen over the last few years, from Clays book, to the Lights, to many other things...the way you were attacked in other places....IT WAS HORRIBLE.....yet you stand right here, still being a fan....still loving Clay...I just dont know if I could be that strong...but Im glad you are here to inspire me...


The same goes for Cincy....I know she left but in fairness to her I need for people to know I am not choosing a side here....Cincy knows that she has done many things for me over the last several years, I have learned alot from her, and I am sorry to see her go...I will keep in touch with her even if she doesnt come back here...have Cincy and I had our differences ? UMM YEA lol we have...but I Love her.....I love all of you...losing any of you hurts....

I have to go to work, and Im sure someone will find fault with my post somewhere as its become the norm these days...just know that I am guilty sometimess of not having the right words or phrase to express how I feel at times...and the emotion gets in the way...my chest hurts, my eyes tear up and I just cant get things clear...but I do Love you all...that is for certain....and Im just so sorry that it has come to this....

I hope that we can all find a peace within through all of this

I just need to say this board cannot go anywhere....LOL
Its a lifeline...so yea if that makes me selfish then color me the
prettiest color of selfish that you can.....I NEED you all....

I dont know what other words can express what I feel....

I NEED YOU

the only three words that make sense in my heart right now...

thank you heather

i love you too

I guess I am in the dark here.
Well, that is not unusual for me anyway.

Quote :

....I hope and pray that my posts reflect that I am your friend....better than being a fan...being a fan is so one sided...but a friendship is something two people can share....

Heather, you need to frame that.

abasketclayse wrote:

Quote :

....I hope and pray that my posts reflect that I am your friend....better than being a fan...being a fan is so one sided...but a friendship is something two people can share....

Heather, you need to frame that.

I need to frame all of YOU LOL

I am a fan of Clays because I dont KNOW him and he does not KNOW me....

but all of you are my FRIENDS....

Morgan has been there for me time and time again...I am much much more than a fan of hers....I did email Cincy that I love her too and will keep in touch...I hope maybe one day she will come back here, I know myself included that many of us will miss her...but there is always email...

ok I look half way decent so I am going to work....wonder if i can call in fugly instead of call in sick HAHA

Love you all

heder

Not having board access or a computer for so long, I view things much differently than before. I don't have it in me to fight or argue with anyone.

I really like the folks here very much and I hope the board never goes away.

I hope Joan comes back.

And, Morgan, thanks for keeping us afloat even though it is often a thankless job. Without you, I wouldn't know anyone except Toonces who brought me so many years ago.